3 Reasons You Might Struggle to Talk in Therapy

3 Reasons You Might Struggle to Talk in Therapy


You started going to therapy because you felt you had a problem that needed professional help. Whether it is a marriage problem, a problem with your kids, or even something related to issues outside the family, you’ve been hoping your therapist can help you figure things out. Yet lately, you are struggling to talk about things. It feels like you don’t even know what to talk about.

According to the experts at Relationships & More, this is normal. When therapy sessions continue for an extended amount of time, it is not unusual to get into a slump. It’s not unusual to show up to your next session without any conversational tidbits to bring to the table.

As a Rye, NY therapy clinic serving clients throughout Westchester County, Relationships & More is fully equipped to handle such slumps. For starters, their therapists suggest three reasons you might struggle to talk during therapy:

1. You Don’t Feel like You’re Making Progress

The first possibility is that you don’t feel as though you are making progress. From the inside, you know the work that you are putting in with your therapist. Yet outside of your sessions, you are struggling to see positive results.

How does that leave you with nothing to talk about? You don’t want to keep talking about the same things week in and week out. After all, talking about them doesn’t seem to be helping all that much. Yet at the same time, the lack of progress tells you that you can’t put those topics to rest just yet. But how do you keep talking about them? How many times can you rehash the same thoughts and emotions?

Again, this is normal. Rather than struggling to come up with things to talk about, maybe you need a session or two to discuss how you’re feeling about your progress.

2. You Are Unsure About What’s Appropriate

Maybe you are making good progress with your therapist. Perhaps the things you have talked about thus far have helped you find meaning. If that’s the case, perhaps your current struggle is one of wondering what is actually appropriate to talk about.

There is a certain learning curve that comes with every client-therapist relationship. While you are trying to figure that out, you may be of the mind that certain thoughts and emotions are out of bounds. In other words, you may feel like there are specific things you cannot talk with your therapist about.

Not knowing the appropriateness of a given topic generally takes that topic off the table. If you take too many topics off the table, you may not have enough to talk about.

3. It Might Be Time to Move On

The third possibility is that it is actually time for you to move on. Relationship therapy is not intended to be permanent. Chances are that your therapist did not take you on as a client with the expectation of seeing you every week for 10 years.

Is it possible that you and your therapist have gone as far as you can together? Sure it is. You may have talked about every relevant topic multiple times over. You have explored every angle, turned over every rock, and peeked around every corner. It is time for you to move on.

Remember that it’s normal to have slumps when you don’t know what to talk about in your therapy sessions. Do not be discouraged. Feel free to explain to your therapist that you don’t know what to talk about and see where it goes. There is always a solution, even if that means it’s time to stop therapy.

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